Trust comes from faith, faith in life, in people and in oneself. It is an inexhaustible source of forces that liberates hope, security and optimism and, therefore, joy and well-being. Without it, personal life languishes and social life suffers.
Each and every one of our relationships, from the most significant to the most insignificant, is based on trust. In our relationship as a couple, in the education of our children, in the commercial transactions that we carry out, in the bonds of friendship, in the work environment, in associations – both in the community, in the city or in the neighborhood, in the public administration. The central issue is always a question of trust.
The key to building a sense of trust in yourself and in others is developing a healthy personal identity. This begins to forge from early childhood with the direct and active participation of the people around us, through the communicative forms they use to address us. But trust is a path to be traveled for life. Once the initial training periods in life have been overcome and they reach adulthood, many people discover their insecurities and great difficulty in trusting others, thus putting in serious danger the vital projects that they have or may develop to throughout his life.
WHY BUILD TRUST
The reflection of trust is observed both in private matters and in common things that affect us all. And despite the fact that the most important journey we must travel during early childhood, afterwards we are presented with frequent challenges, which we must take as propitious moments for the cultivation of this fundamental quality that is trust.
The trust deficit is responsible for making countless bad decisions and therefore the cause of most of our vital disasters. In this way, it constitutes the main source of the mistreatment to which we usually submit ourselves, by imputing the demerit of not knowing how to be better.
A clear example of this is our partner choices, in which our intuition and common sense already alert us, many times, that this relationship is not the one that suits us; But lo and behold, our fateful inner critic insists on warning us that we will not find anything better for ourselves.
Disbelief can only generate one thing: fear and discomfort, doubts and dissatisfaction. The restlessness that it produces represses us and does not allow us to act; makes decision-making difficult, blocks initiatives, collapses action and paralyzes our lives. Confidence, on the contrary, constitutes an inexhaustible source of mysterious forces that liberate hope, security and optimism, and, therefore, joy and well-being
HOW TO REGAIN (AND BUILD) TRUST
- Clearly define your values. Acting according to the deepest values and principles that inspire your life dictates to each one is an inexhaustible source of confidence in yourself and in others. So, try to be clear about the guidelines and values that govern your life. I know of those who can give a short and clear description of its principles!
- Always act honestly. Fulfill the commitments you have made to yourself and to others. In the event of encountering any difficulty, something always unpredictable, the most reasonable thing to do is notify in advance and renegotiate, if possible, the terms of the agreement that you have not been able to fulfill.
- Practice truthfulness and sincerity. Be consistent. Because if what you say differs from what you believe, you will not become someone worthy of being trusted by others. Do not be honest because that is something that corrupts the foundations of any relationship that you can maintain, whatever type it may be.
- Acknowledge your own successes. Observe and accept the critic that you have inside, but do not let yourself be carried away by his appreciations without more. Always value what you do. This attitude will increase your energy and stimulate you to continue making the changes and improvements you need in your life.
- Learn to say no. Giving an affirmative answer and then breaking your word is a destroying attitude of confidence and, in addition, it has the consequence that others have doubts about you.
- Think and act in the medium and long term. To explain it, a little anecdote. In one of my last book purchases in a famous online company, I hit the buy button, and a notice came to my computer: “ Warning! You have bought this book before. Do you want to buy it again? ” They lost that money, but they gained my trust as a customer.