Insecurities 9 steps to resolve conflicts

9 steps to resolve conflicts


How to find creative solutions to our problems? To create a path for us we have to unlearn old habits.

We all have the ability to find creative solutions to our problems. To solve them, we must open ourselves to a different way of looking at reality, not only from the attitudes and beliefs learned since childhood, but with the eyes of a child who sees the world for the first time. The important thing is to find your own path, the authentic one.


Faced with the conflicts of everyday life, we often go round and round a problem and do not find a way to solve it, because we do not realize that the difficulty may lie in how we understand the situation, in the lenses we use to read that reality.

The key is not to find a solution but to reformulate the problem, to look at it in a different way, in a “creative” way.


Sometimes we are so disappointed by the lack of answers to a problem that we give up the search and resign ourselves. We do not realize that there are other paths that we have not explored simply because we had not seen them.

Trust! There is more to you than you think.

Remember that the word creative is rooted in what is created. When we face our conflicts, if we apply the creativity that is born in each one of us, we will be creators of our own life.


Behind the situations that worry or distress us there is generally a conflict: two or more forces, desires or interests that are opposed at some point. The conflict can occur between you and reality or between two aspects of yourself.

In principle, it is important to be able to specify where the conflict is and at what points each of the forces involved in the problem collide.

In each conflict, let’s not hide our feelings and avoid repeating the same solutions that can lead to a monotonous life.


The difficulties posed by everyday life can be seen as obstacles or as opportunities. Opportunity of what? To learn something.

Answering this question can open you up to a new way of looking at the problem, as it is a doorway to what follows rather than an anchor sunk in the past.


Emptying assumptions is the key to moving forward, it is necessary to “unlearn” what we know about the problem, not take anything for granted.

Sometimes the solutions that we have tried to apply to something that worries us are part of the problem itself; so that they prevent us from seeing aspects of the situation and finding new approaches.

Remember that, as the Zen philosophy says, “a cup can only be used when it is empty.”


Take a few steps back. Try to abstract yourself and see the problem as if you were doing it for the first time, as if you were not the one involved, from a broader perspective.

This is called ” doing an exercise in estrangement, ” that is, looking at something as if it were totally strange and unfamiliar. As if you saw a motorcycle for the first time (taking the idea of ​​the writer Julio Cortazar) and said that it was “a giant metallic insect” and not a motorcycle.


As we have said, creativity implies being able to see things differently; For this reason, it is sometimes useful to try other points of view.

To do this, you can try the following exercise. Sit comfortably and imagine: ” If I talked about this situation, what would a boy say to me, for example? And a wise old man? And a boxer?” You can do this exercise with any character or person you can think of.

Just one piece of advice don’t always listen to the old man, the boy and the boxer also know what they say!


After emptying yourself and enriching yourself with other views, it is time to take your place again in the situation and to design new ways of approaching the conflict.

Remember that breaking the routine is key. If we propose to lead a creative life, we find ourselves with a fundamental obstacle: habit, insurance, routine. Let’s tackle new options.


Be encouraged to give credit to your own ideas, beliefs, intuitions, and efforts.

Creative solutions seem riskier, they involve neglecting security. They are not “proven”. But personal growth does not depend on reaching the goal but on what we can learn and enjoy during the journey.

By reinventing our reality, we reinvent ourselves. Living a creative life implies learning from experience, without becoming prisoners of it, tracing our own path.

MindFixes Staff
MindFixes is dedicated to promoting mental health, preventing mental disorders and advocating, educating, and serving all people with mental and substance use conditions. MindFixes is determined to persevere, learn, grow, love and laugh through our wellness journey and we invite all to join.


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